Tribute to Mom Kroeker.
1 Corinthians 13:13 says this, “And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.”
When planning what to say as a tribute to mom we agreed that these three words, faith, hope and love, described both her and the legacy she has left behind.
Faith - Lori
We all have memories of Mom and Dad sitting at the table doing their morning devotions together. Reading from Scripture and from the Rejoice devotional. They read the bible together and alone as well. Mom’s bible was found, intact, in her sewing stool right beside her chair. God’s word was close at hand and close to her heart.
We can picture Mom and Dad holding hands and praying for their family and friends. Each one by name. It was said that you should never put your milk on your corn flakes before mom started praying because they would end up pretty mushy by the end. Mom did not hurry her prayers; she would go through each member of the family, pausing on the ones who needed special attention that day, which over the years included all of us. She would pray for the friends God had placed on her heart that morning and sometimes for those she had just met if the desire came to her. It was a beautiful picture of a woman talking to her Lord, interceding on behalf of those she loved.
Mom was a woman of faith who loved to worship. She would walk around the house singing songs of praise to God. Inserting “la la la” to the tune; she knew the words but just choose to happily sing the las instead. She loved our times of singing as a family and it wouldn’t matter to her if the songs were fast, slow, hymns or choruses, just the fact that we sung together. She would have her hands out and her eyes closed, her face raised to heaven and we’d see her smiling from ear to ear as she sung.
Her’s and Dad’s life have been an example of faith as they have moved from place to place to serve God in a variety of settings and ministries. Her gift of hospitality has been a blessing to so many, along with her listening ear and accepting smile.
Although Dad is not here to give his tribute to his love of 57 years, we know how much she meant to him. Mom supported dad in his ministry and in his times of training in Bible school and seminary. She was such a huge part of his life as she worked alongside him as a wife and mother and as a partner in ministry. It is hard for us to find the words to express their love for each other and support of each other. It is was when you saw them looking into each other’s eyes that you saw the depth of their love and commitment.
Hope - Tiphanie
Mom was a positive person. She saw the best in people and believed in them. No matter what you were going through Mom would come and put an arm around you and speak words of encouragement and tell you she knew things would get better.
In her own life mom had this hope as well. It is no secret that she struggled with depression and in part it was her’s and dad’s transparency and honesty that was an example of hope to others. Mom suffered some very dark days with no motivation to be with people or to do anything. She did not want to feel as she did and did not know why she felt that way. But in those times she would turn to Scripture and to Jesus with the hope that things would change. She would see the light that would lead her out of her dark places and with God’s strength she was able to come out and we’d she who she was created to be. The creative, loving, supporting busy body.
And busy she was. She was an extremely creative lady who sewed dresses, made amazing ginger bread houses and cakes, created advent wreaths and had a great garden of flowers. And who can forget the year she rescued and altered 30 pairs of purple pajamas with small VW beetles on them, and not only that but also created some smaller pairs for the kids so that we could all have matching pjs one year for Christmas. The kids also remember the year she made pjs out of ginger bread print material for them all.
Mom believed in her kids and especially her grandkids. She was so proud of all of you. All that had to happen was for someone to ask if she had grandkids and out comes the photo album and there would be stories attached to each picture and she’d beam with pride and her eyes would sparkle as she bragged about her grandkids and more recently her first great grand child.
The one thing we celebrate today is that her ultimate hope has been realized. She is now who she was meant to be. No more depression, no more bad knees. She no longer has to think or worry about all the projects she had planned to do. She is free to dance and sing, and worship and walk with her Saviour. Her ultimate hope and redeemer has made her whole.
Love - Lauren
When we as a family talked about love two things came to mind. The first was the idea of, “there is always room for one more” which is tied in very closely to the second which was Christmas.
Mom loved photos and, as has already been mentioned, she would gladly pull out her photo album to show off her grandkids, but often there would be pictures of other people, random people that none of us knew but it was someone mom and dad had met on a plane or at a restaurant or something like that and sure enough mom had their life story. And we knew whether we we there or not mom was probably also sharing stories about her family too. The kids remember a number of times when mom happily shared embarrassing stories while they hid their faces.
Mom loved to do special things for people, which was one of her expression of love. We all loved mom’s zweibach and can remember the effort she would go to make it for us. I think on more than one occasion mom and dad arrived at someone’s house with zweibach on pans ready for the oven because she had not had time to make them at home so she formed the dough in the car while driving and put the pans on the back dash in order to rise in the sun. In some ways that made them even better.
Christmas was a fun time at the Kroeker household. There was always room for everyone whether you were sleeping in a bed or a closet or up in the homemade bunks, room was made for everyone. The table was made as big as it could go and we squished in. Mom hardly sat down as she busily made sure everyone had what they needed and often even more than they needed. The whole time there was an air of positive, fun, chaos. But we’d have time to sing together then dad would read the Christmas story while mom would set up the manger scene with characters of all shapes and sizes and with some parts held together with pipe cleaner but it was quiet, and holy and right.
The home was always open, literally… we’re not sure if they ever locked their door in Boissevain. But, more than that, the kids always felt that no matter how old they were they were always welcome to come “home.” And home was not a just physical location, rather it was the warm acceptance that awaited them from mom, dad and the family and the hugs they received as they walked in the door.
Mom wasn't perfect. She had her share of conflict and struggles and it is in some ways because of these that she was the strong woman she was. It was in her imperfection that she allowed her children to be imperfect and to grow in strength and confidence as well, and it was through her welcoming spirit that she modeled and taught her children to be welcoming.
Mom's greatest legacy is sitting in front of us and is a reflection of her greatest love which is her family. We are a group of imperfect people but we reflect faith in our desire to be in relationship with Jesus, in our hope through our belief in, and encouragement of each other, and in our love as we allow room for one more in our growing family, who ever that one more may be, a child, a grandchild, a foster child, or a friend, there is always room for one more.
Now these three remain, faith, hope and love, but the greatest of these is love.
We love you mom.
MARTHA KROEKER'S MEMORIAL, MARCH 26TH @ 1PM
Many have been patiently waiting. Although many of our posts have been about Dad and his condition we have not forgotten another part of this whole journey.
We want to remember Mom, Martha, sister, aunt, and just an all around friend to many, grandma and substitute grandmother for many more. The Mom part of the journey has been hard to concentrate on during the intense times with Dad. And as he remains in critical but "stable" condition we will have the memorial for Mom without his presence at the service (we are working on the feasibility of a live feed into his hospital room). Thank you for your patience in waiting for this day. So for those of you who wish to join us in celebrating Mom (Martha Kroeker)'s life, please come to the Whitewater Mennonite Church, in Boissevain, Manitoba on Wednesday, March 26th @ 1 pm.
Thanks again to all who attended and were watching on the live feed. We appreciate your continued prayers and support for Wally (Butch), Dad, Grandpa, Great-grandpa, brother & uncle.
Tribute for Dad - Irene
There is no way that we could sum up the colourful, complex man that was full of so many contrasts with a few stories in a 10 minute tribute, but our hope is that as we share these stories they will bring to mind memories for you.
While cleaning out his office at the Boissevain MB Church Dad came across boxes which contained his sermons. 15 years of sermons. He said to himself what do I do with these? He wondered if anyone would remember any of the words he had spoken, any of the stories he had shared, had he made a difference?
Well, maybe not all his sermons were remembered, maybe not every story has been held on to, but what we do remember is the man. A man who was much more than the words he spoke.
Our Dad was such a good representation of our Heavenly Father with skin on. I remember first encountering someone who did not like calling God “father” because their image of what a father was, was not good. I was surprised because that thought had never crossed my mind. Of course the image of God as father would be good because my dad was a good father. However, he wasn’t perfect. It is tempting now that he is gone to blur that line between my heavenly father and my earthly father. But to do so would actually dishonour the man that he was. In fact, it was in his willingness to be vulnerable and honest in his struggles that many people who came to him found comfort and strength. He was never anyone’s saviour, but either in word or in deed he would point them to the Saviour. It was because he recognized his need for grace that he was able to receive it and that he was able to give it.
All of his kids remember being recipients of that grace. However, they also remember sitting around the kitchen table getting louder and louder (there were 6 girls remember) when all of sudden that large forearm and big hand would hit the table with a bang. All conversation stopped and we looked at each other and after a minute or so the conversations would start again quietly. You see we knew he wasn’t mad, it was just time to bring the volume down.
Dad adored his wife of 57 years and we all saw it in the way he looked at her, talked about her and would just randomly do things for her, like coming home with flowers. One night when Wally and Pete were visiting dad in the hospital, dad looked at a picture of mom on the wall and said, "She sure was beautiful". By example, he taught his boys what it meant to truly Love and Cherish the Women in our lives.
Dad and Mom shared smiles, laughter, tears and heartache together and no matter if they had fought or were frustrated with each other they remained firm in their love by staying rooted in Jesus through reading the Bible and praying daily. We all knew that wherever we were or what we were doing they were praying for us. They raised their family with the example of loving one another regardless of faults and the importance of staying together and connected as a family.
In a culture that says men must be strong and silent, he was willing to share his heart and to weep with those who weep and laugh with those who laugh. And laugh he did, he loved a good joke. Although we were never sure if he was joking or not when he was asleep in front of the TV and one of us would try to change the channel. Inevitably before the channel changed, between his snores you would hear `Hey, I was watching that.”
Dad often cooked, we all loved his “Grandpa’s pancakes.” There would be a huge stack with cottage cheese, jams, syrup, and cinnamon sugar. It was one of the many ways he supported mom when she was struggling with depression. Dad served with a generous heart whether it was towards his family or to the community.
As a member of the community (Santa hat and wood butcher hat) - Lowell
Dad was a presence in the community, we all knew Christmas was coming when Santa Wally would start walking around town in his Santa hat. Many kids loved to run into Santa on the street, and he would smile at them and often give out candy canes. Pete tells the story that one time Dad had met a little boy and given him a candy cane and after the fact the parents had shared with dad that the boy had said, “that man looks like Santa, he acts like Santa and thinks he’s Santa, but he’s not really Santa.” There were also the kids that believed he really was Santa and one told his Dad how lucky he was to have Santa living in his town.
And who can forget Dad’s passion for Christmas lights. Year after year dad would climb all over the house and spend hours in the yard setting up a spectacular Christmas light display.
He enjoyed doing all sorts of different projects and had the ability to get things working with some duct tape and bailer wire. A skill acquired by many farmers. Not only did he do many projects around the house but who can forget “Wally the Wood Butcher.” Most of the kids and grandkids have benefited from this skill of Dad’s. Dad made benches, hope chests, bed frames, Christmas ornaments, and toys for members of the family and the community.
Dad had the ability to find common ground with most people. Whether he talked farming, golfing, politics, curling, old cars, or theology he would be able to relate on a variety of levels. Dad was able, despite his physical presence, to make those around him to feel at ease. Many of the stories we hear from people have been about his acceptance of them. Marg remembers Dad talking of one time where Dad was taking communion in another church and there beside him at the altar was a person he would have least expected to be taking communion. He related that at that moment God confronted his attitude and let him know that it didn’t matter who you were or what you had done, all were equally desperate for and deserving of God’s grace.
One of the hats Dad wore was that of a driver. He taught all of his kids how to drive, hence the grey hair. From crashing through snow banks on the farm at Elm creek, to trying to merge on the interstates of Pennsylvania, from chasing foxes across fields to the bumps and scrapes on the current van driving with Dad was always an adventure.
It was an interesting contrast, that a man who could be so aware and sensitive to the needs of the people around him could also be so unaware in other ways. Many of us can remember driving with dad and the conversation would go something like, “Uh… Dad this is a one way street and you are going the wrong way… Dad, DAD DAD! What, What. Oh, oh well I`ll just turn here.” Sometimes it was better to just not look.
Dad enjoyed camping and taught many camping and outdoor skills to his kids and to others at camps. How to start and maintain a good campfire, how to fillet and fry a fish, canoeing skills, and just all manner of coping skills that make being outside a real pleasure no matter the weather. And mom and dad continued to tent until just a few years ago.
As a pastor - Ruth
Dad loved to read the Word of God. He would spend time doing word studies from the Bible and enjoyed reflecting and discussing how God was revealing himself through a variety of passages and experiences.
Dad loved to read. Often when he showed up at different homes he would ask, “so what are you reading” and after you showed him the book you wouldn’t see it again until after he left. Well, that’s not completely true. You would see it bent in all directions held loosely in dad’s hands as he fell asleep reading it. It was always amazing how much he remembered of the books he fell asleep to.
Dad would spend time discussing the things he was reading and studying and appreciated hearing what others thought. He enjoyed wrestling through spiritual issues with others and discovering more of who God is.
One of things that made Dad a great pastor was his ability to listen to others without judgement. He looked for opportunities for grace rather than just focusing on right and wrong. Years earlier when I was a new Christian, Dad & I were driving past the Catholic Church in Elm Creek. I asked the prejudicial question, "there are no Christians in that church are there?" Dad quickly corrected me,"Ruth, there are some people in our church that are not Christians and there are some people in that church that have asked Jesus into their hearts." To this day I am inclined to know a Christian by their testimony not the label of the church they attend. It was the way Dad lived his life, he was inclined to get to know people for who they were not for the label or the church they did or did not go to.
Thank you Dad for your example of what it means to be real in both your strengths and weaknesses. You gave us the example of not only how to live well but how to die with grace and dignity. Dad’s last weeks were filled with concern for others and that each would be looked after. Although he was frustrated and in pain he tried to show love to the medical staff and continued to wonder that we were an expression of God’s love. He was convinced that we were not created so that we could love God, instead we were created to be loved by God.
We are full of relief that you are now with mom and no longer in pain and we are full of sorrow that you are not here to share with us anymore. Dad was a man who wanted to share the love of Jesus everywhere he went. He wanted to live out John 13:35, “By this all men will know you are my disciples, if you love one another.” God’s unconditional love was shown to us through our parents not by their effort but by His grace. May God give us the grace to share this love, whether in word or deed, with all that we meet.
WALLY KROEKER'S FUNERAL APRIL 12, 2014
It was good for us siblings to get together and talk as we plan for Dad's funeral and both our parents' interment. All are tired, all are spent, and yet we wish to honor Dad and give God the glory for a life that was well lived.
Dad truly believed that "There is a Redeemer" who was the Son of the God who created us to share His love. So to honor God for the life of our Dad who was loved by God, all are welcome to the following services held:
- On Friday evening @7pm. There will be a viewing for our Dad at the Whitewater Mennonite Church.
- On Saturday afternoon @1pm. There will we a funeral service for our Dad at the Whitewater Mennonite Church.
- On Saturday afternoon after the funeral service. There will be a short interment service for both our Mom and our Dad held in the Boissevain Cemetery. Refreshments will be served after the interment service.
We appreciate again your support and prayers during the funeral of our Dad.We have laid our parents' bodies to rest in Boissevain. We pray that God was honored in all that was said and done. It was a time of memories and blessings.